Duality was Bad Enough…
Creative: Write this!
Writer: Hmmmm okay.
Critic: You can’t write about that!
Writer: I can’t?
Critic: NO! That’s not your genre, you’ll mess it up . Besides, it is controversial.
Creative: Oh leave her be. It will be great, you’ll see.
Writer: Hush, I’m writing.
Critic: Well stop. Write something different.
Creative: Oh hush you stick in the mud. You suppress me (dramatic shudder)
Editor: Hey, that needs better punctuation
Writer: I’ll do it later. Let me get this out.
Creative: Go, go go go, oh that’s good. Good line.
Critic: Good line? Good grief!
Creative: She’s doing great. She’s getting flow. Shut up already!
Editor: Really, that sentence needs work.
Creative: She said she would do it later.
Editor: She could do it now while she’s writing. Less to do later. You know she doesn’t like me.
Writer: I like you fine. Just not now.
Critic: No no no don’t write that! What will people think?
Creative: Shh, she doesn’t have to show it to anyone. She can write it for herself, you know!
Critic: You are leading her astray. She can’t possibly write that kind of piece.
Editor: You forgot a comma.
Writer: WILL YOU ALL SHUT UP! I’M WRITING HERE.
(momentary silence)
Creative (whispers): She’s doing great. That paragraph was really descriptive.
Editor: What’s she writing anyway?
(the three look over the writer’s shoulder)
Critic: GASP! She’s plotting my murder! She’s going to ask Matthew to kill me!! NOOOOOO!
Editor: She’s really into it now. Look at that sloppy penmanship.
Creative: Oh hush. Glad I’m not in there, though. (second dramatic shudder).
Editor: Well, you are now. Oh! And so am I!
Writer: I will take a contract on each of you if you don’t shut up and let me write!
Creative: Please don’t kill me. No, don’t. I’ll behave. Besides, you need me…and Editor. You don’t need Critic. It’s okay to kill Critic.
Critic: WHAT?!
Writer (muttering): I’ll kill you all myself if you don’t go away.
Editor: She’s serious. C’mon, let’s go.
Critic: I told you writing that was a bad idea, but you just had to egg her on, Creative. Now look!
(The voices grow more distant as the three fade into the background. Writer smiles, opens up her novel, and gets to work. She keeps the killing piece open…just in case).
You know, I’m a big proponent of ear plugs when that critic starts to speak. Write it anyways!
I’ve never read a better description of the creative process (for me). The truth in the dialogue is oh so poignant.
These pieces are “naked writing” for me…that stuff in my head, oh goodness, it is real, lol.
@Jamie Ear plugs, headphones, and everything else I can think of, lol.
@Ryan Well hello creative twin. Glad I’m not alone!
Very well written, BJ – and oh so true.
I’ll tell you a secret, Paul. I have a very favorite line in that post. One day I’ll tell.
Thank you for your kind words.
This is brilliant BJ! It’s like you pulled the entire writing process out of my head. Btw, I end up listening to the editor.
I’m trying to teach my editor to hush until the rough draft is out. I think we need a heavy duty obedience school here.
This is fracking brilliant! I love it!
Thanks, Matthew. So, if they get any worse, will you do the deed? hehe.